Monday, January 21, 2008

Oh!! whatever........

I got this in the mail today morning at work sent by a colleague of mine. Take a look....

"The woods were lovely dark and deep. Walking slowly beside her, in the damp mud road, was her husband whom she barely knew. He was very relaxed, happily watching a group of kids playing at a distance.Her "mehandi" was still dark and smelling fresh, reminding of the excitements and tension 2 days back. "It cant work this way mom...please stop this", she kept telling her mother till the last moment, who wouldn't listen but carry on with beautifying her. She had been crying all night and her make-up had to be patched up twice or thrice to hide her awkwardly swollen face.

It was too late now. She had to get married "NOW" to the guy...The guy whom she had seen once and talked thrice. The guy about whom she knew nothing at all but for his name and work. Everything happened in a hurry and everything was over before she could breathe again... here was she with this guy, all alone in this hill station... how can anybody send their daughter such a long distance with a stranger???

"Hey look at that....!!!" he shouted in excitement... she shrugged and looked where his finger pointed... Bright colored balloons dotted the sky. Children were jumping in joy and he seemed to be completely absorbed into it...colors are always exciting...but not now. She was not with her friends, not with her team mates, not even with her parents. This was not a 3 day tour or team building trip. This was her life and she has been forced to start off with this person.Loneliness and discomfort with this stranger was sickening...She looked at him in wonder... does he even realize that he has married me? Does he understand that he has to love me, protect me, care for me, a new girl, a stranger, all his life?

The marriage morning started like a daylight nightmare for her. The first time in life she felt she should have fallen in love and then married somebody. some man who she would have felt more comfortable with, someone whom she could call by name and introduce to friends,someone whom she could trust. But marriage morning was obviously not the time to think all these. Her parents would never have said "no" if she had declared that she was in love. But she was not emotionally attached to anybody she met, especially guys. She was very friendly, playing, teasing, but never had second thought for any man around her. That brought the entire responsibility of looking for a groom on her parents' shoulders. Her parents had had a very bad time with this entire process. They started their groom search with unending "&" operation. The concatenation of "Horoscope matching" & "Decent family" & "Good looking" & "Good pay" & "same cast" & so on... that always gave 0 output. Now after all that 8 months hunt, they were not ready to hear her "ifs" and "buts" for this 'good guy'. She had explained to her father. She does not feel anything for this person. He is nothing more to me than any other software professional. Like list of names she sees in the chat rooms. Distant and usual...Her father asked her to talk to him and even meet him and discuss their likes and dislikes. That meeting started like the induction programme self introduction and ended like a 3 hour seminar.She was waiting to get away from that place. "So did you talk with him?". "yes". "was he polite and decent". "yes". "Oh he got that special flavoured tri-color ice cream...!!!".OK. All her family and relatives discussed...She was given the chance to "understand her life partner" and that they have understood each other "well" and she is ready for the marriage now. All arrangements geared up and it was 24 days after her first meeting that she was getting married to her man... perfect match as everybody else described. Marriage hall was full with excited people, kids got the chance to play, ladies got the chance to wear the silk saree. The smell of rose and jasmine filled the hall. Different poses for the photographer and artificial smiles for the videos. The moment he had tied the sacred thread was unexplainable vacuum in the head. It was over.She was his wife. Accepted by the society and law. Her proud parents were relaxed. This was their duty they had been planning to fulfill since she was born. All this crowd will fade away, leaving her to explore her new world...

He pulled her hand gently to sit on the stone bench. The bench was wet and the chillness was indeed enjoyable. "So what are you thinking about?"... that was an unexpected ball. should she reply? should she be silent? She remembered the two hour presentation she had taken last month. Bold and confident, she kept answering all the queries with a broad smile. Now she remained silent. "Do you know honey... I was not for this marriage too..." Oh my God... what did i hear??? did HE tell that or did i think aloud? what does he mean? didn't he like me? was he forced into this? He must have noticed the quizzical look on my face...with a gentle smile he continued..."I wanted to look for a girl myself, buy her everything, care for her, argue with her, laugh and cry with her, then get married to her... Anything otherwise would be a drama. Traditional drama and i was not for it anytime. But my love for my work and also my stress would not give me time and mind to search that girl...When your parents talked to me 2 weeks before our marriage, about your fear of getting married, to a stranger, i could completely understand your mind. I could see myself in you and that was the moment i decided i will marry you. There was no time to prove myself to you, make you trust me, everything happened in a hurry. But there was the entire life before me, to please you, to love you, to make you trust me. This is no less than what i had dreamt, the girl i was waiting for, is you. Now tell me... will you love me???" Tears came down her cheek. Her parents had done more than their duty. They had found her the perfect guy. Thank you Mom!!! Thank you Dad!!! His question remained unanswered yet both knew the answer...."

Now, after going through this, though things seemed to be filled with promises, I still had a question on my mind. What if this is nothing but a flight of fantasy? And thus started a conversation, which meandered into the various aspects of love-marriage vis-a-vis arranged marriage. I won't list them out for anyone, because enough has already been said. What I can say is that, I'm sticking to my guns and going ahead with my choice.. should things fall apart (god forbid!!) then may be mom-dad can help me out.....

Anywyz, besides all that, this weekend was a hectic one. I mean more hectic than my 40+ hrs of work in the week!! Now, before you start making any wild guesses, let me be clear I was shifting into a new and better (quite obvious I must say) flat. So, there we were, that would be me and Neal, on Saturday morning packing our stuff, rushing off to make sure that the deal is still on, and finally moving out at 7:00 pm. Now that was the first trip, and then there was a second one. So there it was two bachelors loaded with stuff as if both were married men, travelling in the back of a cargo jeep, soiled throughout the day's work. If was quite an effort. let me five you a list of the stuff we had:

1. TV,
2. Cooler,
3. TV trolley,
4. A 5.1 sound system of 2000 watts (or was there another zero I don't really remember!!)
5. 2 beds, 2 double mattress, 2 single mattress
6. About 12 bagful of clothes.
7. A 30kg capacity bag (the kind our aunties fill up completely when coming to India, god bless them.. i love the chocolate box in there :P), full of books,
8. A lots of smaller stuff, which proved to more than we thought we had.
9. I almost forgot, the entire kitchen stuff, that comprised about 2 huge cardboard cartons (say the one in which you got your 21" television)

So that my friends is the belongings of two bachelors. Our landlady threw a fit on seeing our stuff and seemed to be very suspicious that we two were not the only ones staying there (what a shame!!! she questioned my integrity... Do i get to do a Ponting here?? :P) Anywyz, we were tired and dirty... and so dropped off the weary souls. In between I made sure that my lady was kept abreast of all the action out here....

And so turns up Sunday, I still wonder how, I managed to look at the wristwatch striking 8:45 and mistook it for 12:00 pm. That shook off my sleep, it was Isha who corrected me there... and well.. I felt downright sheepish!!! Jeez.... Anywyz, up and about we both got down to some hard work, and set about decorating the flat... Its over now, phew!!!! But then I have taken my call... should I've to take up a flat on rent again, it's gotta be furnished!!!

Anywyz, enough updates on my part. let's hear it from you...
Oh in case, the ones who know are wondering about her, well she spent the weekend at work!!! I hate such work routines!!!

13 comments:

Aashi said...

lolzzzzz....

the first half n the last half.......wrnt linkd.......n yet i njoyd every bit of it


nice read namesake :)

hope ur new flat gives u many gud memories to luk bak on :)

n hey congrats

Sam said...

hmmm.... well.. am ok with the entire stuff here.. but wots with the congrats.. i mean for wot??

Vandita said...

heyyy happy housewarming sam... im away so treat urself from my side plz...
oh and i quite liked the email, but then again, i don't think i'll be able to marry a stranger at all, especially having loved once i wudn't know whether it'll ever be like that...

Keshi said...

invite me in for ut HouseWarming...I'll bring u a pressie...and that wud be LUCK. LOL!

Keshi.

Keshi said...

btw Sam, I hv moved too many times in my life..and with heavy furniture too! I hate MOVING. It sresses me out to the core.

Anyways I hope u enjoy ur bigger n better new home! :)

Keshi.

phoenix said...

hey congratulations on moving to a better home!!!

ive been away from commenting awhile and i can see how much i missed doing it... you are so gifted...whenever i am back i keep reading back old posts...it is really gripping....


hope you are doing well?dont stress yourself too much mr techie....take care :P

Bubbles of FireWhisky said...

wow... sam that was such an - uhhh - interesting read... i wish i could tell you that i read it with a straight face but i dont want to lie... :P

n about the move - trust me, it might be a pain in the butt, but it does give you a PhD in moving and packing... and happy house warming... (i wish i knew where you were living - i would drop by with the token candle [:P])

Sam said...

@vands: thnx!! and all abt the second part.. no comments!!

@keshi: oh you are invited.. it'll be somewhere arnd 9/10 feb...
as for moving, well i've moved about too.. but then had my parents to look over stuff.. this time it was me... :(

@phoenix: thnx... n gifted?? u really think so?? jeez.. thnx again!! as for stress.. well its part and parcel of my life nw.. hafta take it in stride!!

Sam said...

@bubbles: well wot sort of a face were u making??? :P
and u can stil drop by... just turn up at adlabs in the evening.. i'll pick you up from there!!
and well.. i don't think i want this PhD... I had a talk with the "lady" and we decided rather i declared that wen on rent teh flat should be furnished!!!

Pri said...

heyy ...happy housewarming :)
looks lik 08 is springing up lotsa pleasant news for u...
hmm the email was nice...but i dont know what to say...i cant take sides on this topic becaus ive witnessed successes and failures alike on both sides...
as for me............hmmmmmmm...pata nahi...kabhi kabhi uspe (pointing upwards) chodna padta hain ;)

take care!

shooting star said...

nice read...well..i can only say one thing...life is a shocker...u never know wat u have to deal with.....and arranged marriage VS Love marriage.....my point is..all said and done...it should be a happy marriage..with both partners enjoying the ride....otherwise....as u and i know..the world is full of affairs, infidelity,divorces and mistrust.....

Ashu said...

ok now i m game for ur long posts. touchy story, but life is not a story , so marrying a stranger is scary.....

isnt it ?

and i cud relate to this moving out stuff cos i would literally be living in suitcases for next 2 months, feb end tak in US and then once back in india in XXXXXXXX, then got to move to some apartment, but i got 5 bags and many more crap things, reminiscent of something of the past,

neways gooooood post

Sam said...

@pri: tu uspe chodke baith.. tere ko koi tab utha le jaayega!! :P

@ss: point taken.. well said!!

@ashu: oh.. how i agree with u.. a known devil is better than an unknown angel!!!
god!!! living out of the suitcase is so pathetic!! downright... forget it!!! dats life...
and may be they are crap, but they are still urs.. take care!!