We forfeit three-fourths of ourselves in order to be like other people. - Arthur Schopenhauer
Came across this quote a few days back, and it somehow got me thinking. How often is it that just to be acceptable we end up changing things about us? You know, just so that you would be part of the in crowd.... a tendency predominantly found among adolescents and young college-goers. But then come to think of it isn't it what everyone is? I mean, if I'm to look back at myself say 7 years ago, then I'd say I've changed. Now, change is constant can't deny that one. But when does the change make us turn into someone else and drive further away from who we really are. I'm a bit fuzzy on this on and would like your inputs regarding it.
So, tell me what do you think, when does change for the sake of change or for some superficial need take place? How does it affect the personality?
17 comments:
Now this is something spot on. I totally agree to this. I am the biggest victim for this :(
hmmm... may be u can shed some more light on how this happens?
come on ashu.. let's have some of that fire!!
such a profound quote!
**How often is it that just to be acceptable we end up changing things about us?
so true...that is so very true!
well I used to be like that...still do, a lil bit :). But I hv realised that CHANGING for myself and not for someone else, is the best gift I can give myself and my life.
Keshi.
Hmmm so true I would say I too changed or should I put it as circumstances & some situations changed me...but im happy to inform u tht m really glad tht this change happened to me..it didnt drive me away frm the actual me but gave me my identify & i understood who MADHAVI is... :)
Great post mr intellectual ;)
well we do change...change as a person as we go through various phases...
yess sometimes it does make us stronger ...but yet sometimes, it kills a part of u wch u never wanted to die...and thats when we regret the change...
but however much we change or circumstances and situations try to change us,somewhere deep down...we still are the same person we once were...:)just that probably life makes us hide it from people around us and sometimes even from us ourselves...
take care!!
wow great post... and pretty deep, got me thinking too...
well i'd like to agree a lil bit with pri here abt the 'essence' of us never changing howmuchever we change.
whenever we consciously try and change ourselves it is always when we dont wanna go against the tide...say for instance u dont wanna fight with ur folks u'll alter ur point of view to suit theirs...u want to make an impression or remain in the good books of someone u do incorporate things they like in ur way of life...acc to me thats how it begins and then these lil things might become habits which can be termed as relatively permanent changes or modifications in personality traits!
those are my thots...tell me if i made any sense...
great post again...
i used to be one f those ppl hu wud do anythin 2 help othrs out... evn at d cost f my dreams n needs... nt nemr... i dnt think its wrth it 2 lose myslf only 2 fit in sm1 else's ideas f wt i shd b...
hey keshi,
you gave one excellent qoute too..
But I hv realised that CHANGING for myself and not for someone else, is the best gift I can give myself and my life
Dats the way to live....
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mads,
the process of change has just started with u... let it develop a little more.. or may be the changes have beenf or teh better... adn mroe in tune with who u really are... ppl r not so lucky!!
cheers
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hey pri.. dats teh point....
you end up losing urself in a makeshift identity built to satisfy some pre-concieved notions imposed on you....
isn't it so??
ah vands... i agree 101%
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a very wise decision mann.. i've always maintained u r far mroe mature for ur age.. adn i stand by it yet again.. ppl take ages to realise this simple key to happiness....
"you cannot make everyone happy... at least do justice to urself.."
i was just blog hoppin wen i happened to find urs! before i comment, i will say that u have a great blog here! :)
change.. the only thing constant abt change is that, everything changes! but i have always believed that the core of a person is always the same. that is constant.. wat makes ppl "change" are the circumstances around em.. the ones that mould em, define em..
changing to get accepted among people at the cost of losing urself is pointless! that just shows how much disregard we have for ourselves and how much regard we have for others!
its our life, we are supposed to change it around ourselves, not change ourselves around it!
(i hope my words made some sense!!)
cheers!
thanks a lot!!! :)
well u made perfect sense.. it was like i was gng through my own thgts!!!
you can not control the process of changing but you can control the aim of it. Once you realise why you are changing it makes everything clear. But changing for the sake of change never takes place, you change because of circumstances, people or experience. But in the end it is always your personality and not someone else. Chnange doesnt change who you are, it only changes the way you are.
Nice post.. deep one :)
somehow I don't think i agree with you... our personality is an extension of who we are, is it not?
now i dont think i agree with you... our personality is not an extension of who we are, it is exactly who we are including all the changes, no matter what was the reason for them .... :)
thanks for droping by my blog :)
That's a great quote!And very true.
Change is inevitable,but not at the cost of losing one's identity and turning into someone unrecognizable by one's own self.
nice girl...
Quite right but then we change.. dats normally due to our personality... if yours is to remain unaffected.. you won't change, would you??
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precisely so sameera.... but we often tend to do that... whether we want it or not!!!
how can it remain unaffected? thats not possible, you can not control yourself that much ignoring what is happening around ... :)
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